"Kill Them with Kindness"
Years ago in one of my early teaching assignments, I was placed in summer school working with a group of young women who were in the special school for pregnant and parenting teens. I was excited about the new challenge and began with the idea that I was going to make a difference in their lives, but I think the opposite took place—I was changed.
My expectations were that we would be one happy family as I taught them about parenting, but their plan was to make my life miserable. I didn’t understand how they could say and do the hateful things to me and I wanted to quit, but in order to secure a full-time position for the next year I had to return each day. I didn’t want to; in fact, I would cry all the way home and plead with God asking Him not to make me go back, but instead of releasing me from the job, He gave me instructions to “Kill them with kindness.”
When an unkind remark was made, I would respond with an encouraging statement. When they would mock me to their friends, I would respond with kindness. When their eyes rolled, a smile would appear on my face.
As the summer session progressed, I began to realize that they didn’t hate me; they hated their lives and were taking it out on me. Most of them lived below the poverty level. They survived in small cramped homes. Many had gotten pregnant just because they wanted someone to love them while others had been raped resulting in pregnancy. There was even one 12 year old child who was pregnant with her second child due to incest. No wonder they hated life.
Although I was only there for six weeks, it opened my eyes to the unfairness of life and gave me a new appreciation for the wonderful blessings God had given to me—a good family, nice home, caring friends, loving parents and my Christian heritage to name just a few. It also taught me that everyone needs to feel loved, to be respected and to have kindnesses shown to them.
When the term was over, I was sad to leave because I had bonded with them and knew that they also cared for me. As each student exited the door, we hugged (this would be illegal today) and with tears in their eyes they said “Thank you.” We had all changed all because of God’s simple instruction to me.
Colossians 3:12-13 Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.
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